Tell me when you hear my heart stop.

well, tomorrow is my birthday. i'm excited, but i'm not sure if i want to grow older. time goes too fast already, you know? and i've been purposely neglecting my blog because, well. just a small event, not even an event really. a bit of someone else's event, that has sort of torn me. i feel pathetic that something is hurting me like it is. it shouldnt, i get that. but...it does. and i hate that i care this much. and i also am aware that if i let myself, i would be throwing everything in my brain right onto the pages of this blog every day trying to get it out of my head. so hence, the neglection. its just like everyday is a reminder, i can't even get away. and my brain wont let it go. i wont let it go. but then something happens, and all the sudden theres this tiny, tiny flicker of hope in my head. so i apologize. and yes, i feel incredibly lame. so i need no reminders, thanks.

on a different note, today is my mum's birthday. i think it's incredibly cool that i was born a day after her.

also, i have found new music! well, ok. not really new, exactly. just rediscovered awesome music ;) so if you have time to spare, look up the cranberries and the pixies. best song for the cranberries is zombie, and where is my mind is totally awesome from the pixies. also, i have rediscovered the white stripes, which always makes me happy. i've basically grown up with them, sometimes unconciously, but i absolutely adore them. definitely on the list of concerts i have to see in my lifetime.

anyway, i'm sorry for the smallness, the melacholiness. i'll be better next time, promise. sometimes you just need a bit of time to wake.

xx

{emma}